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I spend too much time in my car

2/26/2019

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I was dozing off in my chair near the end of last year, and I realized how little I'd accomplished that day. Many of the chores and random computer work I have to get done was always being pushed to the side because I couldn't get the MUST DO's done with all the in-vehicle time. I'm all about letting shit slide, but it's not fun when you're completely out of clean spoons.

I'm a family taxi driver at the moment, due to our one-vehicle household situation. There are quite a few things I can't do on the road. Laundry, dishes, computer work, cooking, etc. Which means I need to knock out as many things as I can to make time for the never ending struggles of being productive at home.

Here are five things I started doing in the car...

1. Phone Calls
When I know I have phone calls to make, I dial my phone before I start a long car trip. Whenever I'm going to be driving during rush hour, I'll always plan to return calls then. I have a set of generic wireless earbuds constantly plugged into my ears, so I can avoid looking down at my phone as much as possible. I don't tend to have phone calls that necessitate note-taking, so I can chat, touch base, and if anything needs followed up, I ask the other person to email me. I can always use voice command to text myself anything vital after I hang up. I rarely answer my phone at home. Sorry, folks. You get car time.

2. Reading
I talked a couple blogs ago about my love affair with Audible. My time in the car was a huge reason I splurged for the monthly Audible subscription. I've been able to read at least one book a week by listening as I'm getting prepped in the morning, and, of course, car time. I'm happier when I'm reading, and this gives me a fix when it's not safe for me to bring out my kindle.

3. Eating
Okay. This might have quite a few of you shaking your head at me. I do try to take the time to sit down and eat meals at a table. But when you're spending a few hours a day in the car, you're probably going to need to multi-task somewhere. I keep meal bars on hand for breakfasts, and that's what I usually eat on the go, but I have gone through a drive-thru or two and purchased foods with serious one-handed eatability. (Tacobell's crunchwrap is probably my fav.) 

4. Brainstorming
My voice recorder gets a workout during my time alone in the car. If I'm stuck on a project, I'll often run some errands and keep the recorder handy. An idea always comes up when I do this. And I get to check shit off my To Do list at the same time.

5. Charge my devices
I've made a habit of always plugging in my computer and tablet in my house before I leave, but I travel with my phone, kindle, and two battery packs. I have an old ass phone, and it dies after only a few hours. If by some miracle, my phone is at full charge, I plug in a battery pack or my kindle when I hop in the car. It's a good way to make sure I don't run out of juice.

Now...there are times where I'm waiting to pick someone up. In that case, I'll respond to emails, check social media, download more books or podcasts, and even mediate. I don't afford myself a lot of luxury items, but my phone is one thing I've splurged on because I truly have to use it like a computer. 

Do you have a long commute? Or a lot of time spent in your vehicle? What are some things you've found yourself having to do when you run short on time? I'd love to hear about it.

​~Roxy

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I had my Query reviewed in #10Queries

2/23/2019

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I follow quite a few editors I admire on Twitter. While scrolling mindlessly one day, some of them started talking about something called "#RevPit" and "#10queries".

So I went through the new to me hashtags and worked my way back to an article called "February #10Queries Event". It was an event that would show editors during a twelve hour timespan tweeting about submitted queries and first five pages. I have a few other agents and editors I follow that do something similar, and I'm always fascinated by what makes an agent or editor pick up or reject a manuscript. (Follow @LZats and her #500Queries thread if you aren't already.)

I needed to keep up on this shit! It was a no-brainer to go through the rafflecopter widget the blog post used and see if there were any other interesting people I needed to stalk. 

Not only do I love finding new writerly people on Twitter, but it would help me remember to follow the stream the day of. Well, turns out, by following these people, I was entering to win a review of my own query and first pages.

A query and first pages I didn't have yet. Which became glaringly obvious to my sleep-deprived brain when an email came through telling me I'd won and needed to send my query letter and first five pages within two days.

Ummmm....

I texted my lovely critique partner with a huge HELP! She told that we had this, and we got to work. Oh the things we're able to accomplish when we have a deadline, am I right? I had a manuscript that was "almost" done. I had an entire notebook filled with my brainstorming scribbles, and I had a few inspiration pics along with a happy notes notebook filled with research. A polished first five and decent query? Nope. Definitely didn't have that anywhere near done.

So we worked. My CP is fucking brilliant, and somehow she says the perfect things that send me in the directions I didn't know I needed to go. We had something at the end that flowed beautifully. It had taken us all damn night, but the eve of the due date, I hit send.

Sure...the morning after I double checked everything and had a "choose/chose" error. Because OF COURSE I DID. But it was off into the void, and there was no taking back that email.

​I was suddenly obsessed with following the #10Queries hashtag. The few days between us sending off our work, and the event were filled with editors teasing us in the best way. 

The day of, I stalked the feed far more than I thought I would. But before you tease me relentlessly, here's the thing... I hadn't put my work out to anyone in over a year. My little creative heart was absolutely palpitating just waiting for the first scraps of feedback. 

It turned out there were only a couple paranormal romance books entered into the contest, so my CP and I traded screenshots and tweets over the course of the event. 

"What about this one?"

"Nah. I wouldn't describe your writing like that. Maybe this one?"

"Nope, didn't have that event in my pages. Not me."


Rinse. Repeat. Continue for twelve hours. 

​Okay. Event over. It ended at 10pm which is usually my bed time. Some of the editors posted that they'd sent off the reveal of who their tweets were for. 

I checked my email. Nope. Not mine. I stayed up until 11:30pm that night, which for this early bird is pushing it. When I got up at five in the morning the next day (#5amclub4life) I checked again. Nope. Nothing. Nadda.

I waited, scrolled, obsessed, and guessed for the better part of the next five days, and honestly, it got a little sad. Some folks were posting about the "great feedback" and "all the work" that the editors did. Okay. I subdued my mind a little by guessing my editor must have been putting some specific suggestions together regarding my query and first five. If I had to wait a little longer for an email, I'd suffer through it.

​Then the email came. Five days later. And revealed my tweets. Just my tweets. No other feedback was provided.

Q7: Para Romance - The voice is killer (pun intended). I am excited to get to know this MC, but the query is missing high stakes. I get a hint of the internal conflict, but it's not clear why the decision matters or what the worst-case scenario is. □ #10Queries #RevPit

— Victoria Griffin (@victoria_grif7) February 16, 2019

P7: Fantastic voice and smooth pacing. These pages flow well, introduce the main conflict, and make me excited to read more. #10Queries #RevPit

— Victoria Griffin (@victoria_grif7) February 16, 2019
At least I found out which tweets were mine, and for the most part, they overwhelmingly positive. But here's my overall takeaway from this event.

I think that by following along trying to figure out which tweets were mine, I lost some of the value in the other tweets. Because once I eliminated them and moved to the next, it was hard to pay attention.

Like I said, the tweets were the only feedback I received. So if you're going into this thinking you're going to get a track changes style edit, don't get your hopes up. Maybe others got more detailed review than I did, but I think it all depended on which editor was randomly assigned the projects.

While it was good for me to practice the query, and get my editing gears turning again, I don't think I'd enter this particular contest again, because I feel like I missed out on a lot of the advice in the other tweets. My obsessive mind latched onto which tweets were about me, and I couldn't stop tearing them apart looking for clues. 

I think the #10Queries loop was fantastic to follow as a spectator, however. Now that I'm on the other side of the event, I've been reviewing some of the information, and I missed a lot of the good stuff. 

And while I'm not jumping up and down, I do have a query letter finished that I wouldn't have otherwise. Win. I'm going to send it off to a few other people to get some detailed feedback on, because I'd like some specifics. And I'm more confident it's not a total piece of garbage. Also a win.

Turned out this event came before the due date for my #CarinaPitch entry I got a like on. So...it was a damn good couple months on Twitter for me. 

Have you entered a Twitter pitch contest before? What did you think of it? Were your expectations higher than the reality? Would you enter your particular event again? I'd love to hear about it.

​~Roxy
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Audio Books are my new obsession

2/22/2019

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Well, first of all, I should say I'm still on my Kylie Scott binge. Damn, can that woman write!! And being that she has a decent backlist I've got two of her series going on side by side at the moment. I tend to have both audio and ebooks on hand so I can get my read on no matter what the circumstances. This woman is all over my kindle, overdrive, and audible applications.

My family recently became a one vehicle household due to budget cuts, and I think I spend at least half of my waking hours either getting ready to get in the car, being in the car, or filling the car up with gas. 

Obviously, reading an ebook while doing these things is not conducive to my, or my family's, survival. 

Enter Audible. 

I don't have any special links with kickback, or a brand deal. Good lord, I wish! But I have been obsessed with my Audible subscription. And other than my coffee and wine budget, it's the one luxury I spend the money on. Why? Because if I have to listen to one more radio DJ talk in my ear I'll tear the damn device out of the dash with my bare hands. I do enjoy music, but I'm over the ads, and with an election coming up, I am not down for the smear campaigns. 

I have wireless earbuds I keep in my ears almost all day, and as I start my long hours of errands, and...you guessed it...car driving, I simply push a button and I'm reading.

I'm on the basic audible subscription, but I tend to save up my credits and bulk buy. So I listen to new to me authors on Overdrive and borrow from my local library. And if a book I'm interested in checking out isn't there, I recommend my library pick it up. Seriously, if you are bummed by your library's digital selections, pop a recommendation in through Overdrive. My library has purchased quite a few books I've suggested. Although, if it's a book I want NOW, I pop over to Audible or Amazon and download anyway. Life is too short not to read a book NOW.

​Currently I have "Deep" in my ears. I'm working my way through the Stage Dive series at record pace. And honestly, I'm kind of shocked because I'm not really a rockstar trope type of gal. But the situations she's thrust these characters into, the story telling and the outright funny moments have me absolutely enamored. 

The narrator for this series is stellar. Andi Arndt is going to be a voice I'm on the lookout for. And seriously...just pulling up a link for this narrator, I found an Audible Original and one-clicked the hell out of that shit. 

I adore finding an author that checks all of my Romance boxes. Kylie Scott has deep POV, humor, spice, and a talent for building a world it's easy to get lost in all the while telling a story that locks you into one couple at a time. Now that I've been so entrenched in audio books, a great narrator has also gone up high on that list. 

Turns out, I'm a single narrator listener. I'm not thrilled when there's a cast. And since the Stage Dive novels are told from one POV, it works out even better, because I feel like I'm listening to a friend tell me the most fantastic tales. 

Do you listen to audio books? I used to only listen to self-help books, but I am loving having romance in my ears as well as beneath my fingers. Do you have any favorite listens? Or narrators you adore? I'd love to hear about it. 

~Roxy

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Are cats Psychic?

2/21/2019

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Okay. Hear me out. I think cats are psychic. Or at the very least, empathic. 

I've noticed over the past few months that my stress level correlates with how much of an asshole my cat is.

If I'm stressed out, and grumpy, my cat claws at the furniture more. If I'm sad and depressed, my cat eats less. If I'm upbeat and happy, my cat can't be out of my sight and is kneading my legs with a loud boisterous purr motor. 

There are a whole lot of beliefs about felines throughout history. They were everything from unlucky minions of the devil, to revered gods or hosts to souls awaiting their trip to paradise. But I'm not talking about that. 

I'm talking about modern cat ways.

I know a lot of people who feel cats are attuned to things just outside our knowledge. They will stare at nothing for long stretches of time. They get agitated for no real reason.  And let's not talk about the "kill" button that exists right next to the "happy purr" one. I know I'm not the only one who has gotten a decent bunny kick to remind me to trim my cat's nails.

Cats are intensely expressive. I'd argue more than dogs, but man's best friend can work some puppy eyes. However, I'm talking about more than emoting. I find cat behaviors are influenced by what energy we put out there. 

Since I've been working every morning on my morning pages, I've got a damn good record of my mental state each day. And the funny thing is, I've started to see some very interesting correlation between my mood and my cat's behavior. 
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A few days ago, I was stressed about a lot of things. I was running short on money and the bills were starting to pile. I had been running like crazy to attempt to get clean clothes in the closet and clean dishes in the cupboards. I was living on coffee and chasing a timer to get it all accomplished before I had to run and pick up hubby from work. I realized I hadn't seen the cat all day. I found him when I went to put away some towels. 

Some cats hide often, but this guy usually owns a room. Plopping down in the middle of a doorway, or the floor where multiple people have to step over him. I realized I was stressed and he reacted to my energy by holing up in a tight space where the scents of everyone in the family were. Interesting.

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Another day I was writing about feeling really down. I felt a lot of failure piling up in my mind, and it was one of those days where I read a book out of necessity for escape. I needed a happily ever after in the worst way. While I was reading he climbed up on my lap. His paws stretched out so he was gripping the side of my leg. This guy tends to lay on my legs from ankle to hip when he's looking to sleep. This time he curled up sideways and melted into my lap. I've noticed a few times since then, when I've been sad, he's gripped my legs in what looks like a hug. Of course he uses claws to maintain his grip, but it's the thought that counts. 

I've been starting to mark down odd things he does in my journal, because this critter has become a barometer for me to check my emotional state. 

When I'm in the thick of my To Do list for the day, my mental state rarely crosses my mind. But when my cat leaps out from behind the couch and starts scaling the arm of it as if it's the only way out of a pit of lava, I pause. Nine times out of ten, I'm in the middle of a mental spiral of negativity and need to take a break. 

So I'm convinced. Cats can read our emotions. At least mine can. And better than I'm able to most days. 

What about your pets? Do you notice a difference in how they act around you during emotionally charged moments? I'd love to hear about it.

​~Roxy
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A chat about Expectations

2/20/2019

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I wanted to try something a little different here. I've been listening to podcasts for a while, and although I might not be ready to pull the trigger on that just yet, I thought I'd test out an audio chat with you guys.

Let me know what you think!

In the short chat below I discuss expectations in Romance. Turns out I have some hard and fast rules regarding expectations, and when I read books labeled romance, they better have a few things involved in the Happily Ever After.

From focus on the romantic relationship to consent, I chat about what I expect when I pick up a book. (TW: I do discuss rape, but only on a surface level.)

Tell me what you look for in Romancelandia. Do you agree with me? Or do you think I'm dead wrong? I'd love to hear about it.

​~Roxy
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It's a day for love...Or just buying shit

2/14/2019

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I am married. I have been married for sixteen years. It took me most of those sixteen years to convince my husband that I'm not a fan of Valentine's Day. 

Yes. I said it. I'm not a fan of this holiday.

But you're a romance author!

Yes. I know.

How can you hate love?

Whoa. Nope. Back that train up. I love love. I adore romance. I despise someone trying to tell me that if I don't perform specific actions or buy specific things that my love somehow isn't good enough.

Love is about more than candy and flowers and a meal at a crowded restaurant where you have to repeat yourself because of the noise level.

For me, love is coming home to a clean kitchen and takeout after a long day of work. Love is a dirty text at an inappropriate moment that makes you laugh. Love is sneaking a smack on the ass while walking by in a crowded room, or a distracting blow job during a video game. Hubby has treated me with chocolates at the most random times, and it's the best. And every year he buys me a single white rose on our anniversary to commemorate out rose ceremony from our wedding vows.

Love doesn't need to be big and audacious. For me, love is comfortable and overwhelming at the same time. It's that feeling of needing someone to be with you, but not needing to entertain them. It's finding someone to celebrate success with, but still flourishing in tight times or uncomfortable living arrangements. Love makes it okay, because the person you're with makes everything better. Not because they fix everything, but because them being by your side means you're blessed with more than money could ever buy.

I'm a huge fan of creating our own holidays. Things that mean the world to us. Like the day we got married. And the cold day in January almost twenty years ago that hubby pulled a diamond ring from his pocket and proposed, because the idea of waiting until Valentine's Day was too much. Those times are worth celebrating.

Don't get me wrong...Valentine's Day isn't all bad. There tend to be some damn good sales going on. Especially the day after Valentine's Day. Who else is excited for "Half Off Chocolate Hearts" Day? ME!


~Roxy

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Planner Pokemon: Gotta Buy them all

2/13/2019

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Since I have stumbled into the world of Happy Planner, I've noticed something. These ladies know how to market to my generation. We grew up as a gen of collectors. From baseball cards, to pogs, to pokemon, to those plastic charm necklaces that got tangled in our hair, but we could have given a shit because, Did you see? The little bicycle actually peddles!

I remember being obsessed with blind bags, and garbage pail kids, and even beanie babies. It was all about finding the few rare gems that you knew weren't available to everyone. Consumerism meets treasure hunting in all these cases, and those chicks at the Happy Planner headquarters found a way to do the same thing, while making us justify spending the cash because it's for getting organized! We do need it this time.

via GIPHY

My obsession with YouTube meshed perfectly with my new found planner obsession. I found channels like Heart Breathings and The Planner Sophisticate that gave me great ideas, and were just plain visually appealing. Then I started falling into the vast pit of "Haul Videos". It was all over. I could have people shop for me! It let me make better online ordering decisions, and I was all about knowing what I was buying ahead of time since the pictures of planners in online stores aren't very extensive.

But I noticed that a lot of these items were limited releases. I would drag my feet, and wait until I had time and go to the stores only to see they'd been picked over like a blizzard was coming and everyone needed bread. 

Then these hoes over at Happy Planner HQ released certain designs only at certain chains. 

Before I knew it, I was traveling to three different stores because I NEEDED the stickers from Joann's, the extension pack from Michael's, and the planner available at Staples. It hit me. This is my beanie baby collecting inner child coming back to bite my budget in the ass.

Dammit.

I knew I was influenced by ads, but this one snuck up on me.

I've been stalking the clearance sections now, and sales. If I can't use a coupon, or don't have a VERY specific need, I don't buy it. But it doesn't mean I don't watch the videos. Some of these chicks with their perfectly manicured hands and calm voices relax me more than ASMR videos. 

I'm trying really hard to use up the products I have. Will I stop buying stickers? Probably not, but if I don't think I'll use at least 50% of the book when I can buy it on sale and use a coupon, I leave it behind now. Because my stash is embarrassingly large. Although I think any writer has a stash of office supplies somewhere in their home. Don't judge me too harshly. Y'all have some washi tape covered glass houses too.

But be weary. You might find yourself needed extra storage to keep you planner supplies. Don't let this happen to you! Or if you are already a lost cause like I am, tell me when the next sale is!


​~Roxy
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Devil's Advocate on Grammar in Social Media

2/12/2019

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I have heard both sides of the argument for proper grammar in social media posts. 

Side 1:
If you are a professional, or want to be viewed as one, proper grammar in every aspect of your public persona is vital. How can people take you seriously if you can't present yourself as such?

Devil's advocate:
Social media is supposed to be about interacting in a more relaxed and social setting. People are meant to joke and play, and do things to show they're human. So making mistakes is part of that. Professionalism is reserved for work emails, meetings, and contracts.

Side 2: 
People want the abbreviations, slang, and general goof-off in social media. Interacting with people as they would interact with you is important in all avenues, but especially where they go. Facebook tends to be an older crowd. Twitter needs punchy and sensational draw. Instagram is littered with extra emojis and short videos. (Don't ask me about Snapchat. I'm too old for that one.) It's important to observe what crowd you're catering to and adapt.

Devil's advocate:
Even if you're using social media channels as a way to maintain an online presence, you need to remember that what you put out is part of your brand. Do you want to be the person who never spells correctly and then try to sell people your newest release? It's important to put out what you promise to deliver, and you don't want people thinking you're delivering them crap.

Where do I fall?

Somewhere in the middle, as I'm assuming most of us do. I'll use a slang term or alternate spelling on occasion. I'm hip to the ways of the kids these days. (No, I'm not, but I pretend really well sometimes.) Mostly, I use terms and sentence structure you'd hear me spout in person. I'm not good at putting on a false persona, and as I get older, I have no desire to hide who I am. I don't use proper grammar in my every day life. Thank goodness for my editors reigning me in!

However, I do think what I put out online should be something I wouldn't be embarrassed to say in public. And it should be something that people don't have to read ten times to understand. Bad grammar can cloud your message because people will have to decipher your code of incoherent shit.

I can translate typos, so I don't hold it against someone who drops the occasional comma. But the glorious Google is always there to check spellings for us. I will judge you if you neglect to do a simple search to ensure complex words are written correctly. And I will especially judge you if you don't use punctuation AT ALL. I have seen this going around quite frequently and it drives me nuts. Periods in sentences are not the same ones that make us break out in zits and curl around a water bottle once a month. Don't be afraid of them in your social media posts. 

But the main thing is to not take it too seriously. Did you throw out a doozie of an error? Call yourself out and laugh with it. It happens. 

Are you a perfectionist when it comes to social media grammar? Or are you more relaxed? I'd love to hear about it. And if you want a video to help you realize your posts aren't that bad...check this out. Made me giggle. 

​~Roxy
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Sometimes Woo Woo Wows you

2/10/2019

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I've been doing a complete Miracle Morning (granted a short one, but I check off every letter of my SAVERS) for 41 days now. Yes, I got my scribing done just before I hopped on here. Give me my applause. 

And y'all...things are starting to happen. 

I'm in a better mood. Maybe it's the meditation, maybe it's the gratitude I'm doing every day, or maybe it's the fact that I'm reading everyday again. Who knows. But what I can tell you is I find myself smiling more. I find myself saying more positive things to myself and others and meaning every damn word. After the negative place I found myself in last year, it's a welcome change.

I've also found I'm more patient with myself and my family. Don't get me wrong. I still get frustrated, and I still get overwhelmed from time to time, but I find I'm a lot more able to deal with the emotion, acknowledge it, and work toward a solution instead of spinning my wheels.

I'm on the second month of swatching a big red X through the day to complete my Miracle Morning, and even if the entire day gets dumped upside down on it's head, I can look over at that calendar and take a breath knowing I've accomplished SOMETHING. Not just one something either, six of them. 

Now...we get to the real tea. 

My path to publication stalled after quite a few no's recently. And I took it hard. Last year I was hoping to self-publish some of my books, but the fact is, they weren't ready and neither was I. This year I started on January 1st with my miracle morning, and some affirmations about my writing. 

I've written more in these last 40 days than I had in 4 months last year. I'm seeing the spark return, and I'm excited again. I've also been trying out a few pitches and contests here and there. I've gotten two hits in less than two months. 

Again...could it be luck? Could it be chance? Of course. 

But it could also be the fact that I'm putting my Miracle Morning into practice. It could be that those affirmations are starting to manifest. It could be that the woo woo stuff I'd scoffed at is making a real difference in my life.

Am I saying that you have to do a Miracle Morning yourself, to get results in your life? No. I don't know you and I don't know what your personal goals and dreams are. But what I will tell you is I'm seeing real results from my practice. I'm seeing proof in my own life that changing my mindset is working, and what I'm putting out into the world is growing bigger and faster than I planned.

Maybe this woo woo stuff isn't bullshit. Maybe you should give it a try too. If you practice a miracle morning and have noticed changes, I'd love to hear about them. Tell me all the good things you've brought about in your life. Let's spread some awesome around the internet today. 

​~Roxy
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What Would I Do If I Knew I'd Succeed?

2/9/2019

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What would I do if I knew I'd succeed?

That was a question I first heard on a podcast that has quickly become one of my favorites, "Unf*ck Your Brain". A lot of people I've talked to didn't get the same impact from the question as I did. They must not be listening to the podcast. They're missing out.

But the question resonated with me, and I have a feeling a lot of people with a debilitating fear of failure would benefit from thinking on this one too.

I want to break down exactly what this question sparks in me, and share just what kind of meaning it's already started to bring into my every day life.

I'm petrified of failing. Maybe it's that one D I got on a report card in elementary school that sparked it. Maybe it's the fact that I came out on top of a lot of school projects by working the system and learning the teachers instead of the material. Or perhaps it's the fact that I get some of my best work done last minute. (That's what my inner demons chant around the fire, but that's a topic for another day.) However you look at it, I've spent the majority of my life earning grades, getting jobs, and most of it was a first time success. I didn't have a lot of failure, so the first time it happened for me...in any capacity...it was devastating. 

As much as I want to break out and do something fantastic, routine feels comfortable. Even if it's a routine I hate, it's a known entity. As I've gotten older, the routines I've forged out of financial and health necessity have started to turn into ruts. It's a lot harder to change a position you've been in for a decade, than it is to upend just a year long venture.

What would I do if I knew I'd succeed?

This question struck me. Would I be doing exactly what I was doing now if I knew I couldn't fail? Nope. Not a chance. I work in retail. With no benefits. And no hope of promotion unless I'd agree to a 50 hour work week, and following rules I don't agree with. I don't know of anyone who'd be doing that.

But it's hard to go from someone who is stuck in a rut to taking chances on dreams that seem monumentally huge. It's damn difficult to put yourself out there to someone who might *gasp* say, "No."

That's why I started with some baby steps. 

There's a technique I've talked about previously called "Thought Ladder" that brought me to a way to use this idea of shooting for the stars in my every day life.

My end goal is to think big enough and have enough confidence in myself and my abilities to ask "What would I do if I knew I'd succeed?" and have the perfect answer. Frankly, I don't have an answer yet. But I'm working on it. Let me show you what path I've started on to get myself to the big dreams.

1. It wouldn't hurt if I tried this.
Not even a question, but go with me here. Many of the things I want to go for and step out of my comfort zone for, send my mind on a world-ending spiral. So taking a step back and reminding myself that most of the things I can take a chance on won't change my current situation at all, or will only result in a "no" or an opportunity I still have the choice to take or not take, puts my brain at ease. 

2. What great things could happen if I tried this instead?
We've moved up to a question. See? Progress. Asking myself what good things would happen instead of just a general "What if?" sets me up for a positive mindset that I'm going for. And using "could", allows me to let my brain still cling to the fact that the good might not happen, but makes me realize it's a possibility. 

3. What's the best outcome in this instance? And what would be the minimum I want to proceed with the project?
Now we're getting somewhere. Here's the tricky part. Sometimes the best outcome I've pictured in my head is smaller than what happens. I'm a "realist" sure, some say pessimist, but they don't understand me. ;) When I go over exactly what I think the best outcome is, I learn that sometimes I'm wrong in the best way. Sometimes I don't hit the goals I set, but there is still something worth going for. Which is what the second part of this query is about. If I get something good out of the venture, what is the bare bones I need to move forward. In the writing world especially, this could be a contract. Best case? A hefty advance. Minimum requirement? A solid contract with an end date and an exit clause.

4. What would I do if I knew I'd succeed?
We've made it! This is where I'm trying to get to with every part of my day. What would I do if I had the option of doing whatever I wanted with my life? And how would the action I'm taking at this very moment benefit that? What would I do if I knew I had the secret sauce and whatever I touched would turn gold?

Me? I'd be promoting. I'd be querying. I'd be putting myself out at book signings. I'd be writing. 

Taking my own advice is damn hard sometimes. And I get discouraged. But it's worth taking a shot. Let's walk through a very recent example of this practice I had with #CarinaPitch. I've been intrigued by Carina as a publisher for quite some time, and I have a project I've been fiddling with for far longer than I should be. (AKA, it should be done by now.) Carina Pitch is a twitter contest where you attempt to entice an editor at Carina with your pitch in tweet form. 

I started out at Step 1. It wouldn't hurt if I threw out a tweet for the pitch. They're accepting proposals, so I'm well within the rules to toss out a tweet for my WIP. This contest is good elevator pitch practice, and exercises my logline skills. I should try this.

Step 2. By doing this I could gain name recognition with the editors at the publisher I've got my sights set on. I can familiarize myself with their submission process, and if I were to get a request, I have a chance at getting excellent feed back about what they're looking for.

Step 3. The best outcome would be getting a request or two. I could get a deadline I desperately need, and get feedback about the project from industry professionals. The minimum benefit would be practice tightening my words, finding my hook, and reaching out to some of my contacts for feedback. When I laid this out, there was no good reason not to give it a shot.

Step 4. If I knew I'd succeed, I'd write out a second tweet by myself for the project (we were allowed two per the rules), and go for it. If I knew I'd succeed, I'd submit the best work I can do, and gain the attention of the editorial director and my editor of choice. I'd submit my proposal and I'd sign a contract I am excited to put my name on.

I got three requests. One of them from the editorial director herself. I pulled a couple of my buddies into my process for one of the tweets, taking time to work it down to the best possible verbiage. The other tweet, I gave myself the freedom to knock it out and have fun. Both got requested. 

Did I think any of that would happen? NOPE. But now I'm working out my submission, and getting some seriously excellent help from some friends. I'm also doing something I probably wouldn't be doing unless I'd had the audacity to ask myself, "What would I do if I knew I'd succeed?"

~Roxy
 
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