I don't know how long ago, or how many times, but I know I've talked about making the decision to do something on this blog before. That decision could be anything from finally moving that load of laundry you've washed three times already to the dryer, or setting up a retirement plan and drafting a will.

We make decisions about how to spend our time every day, and for a lot of us procrastinators out there, we find ourselves saying things like...

"I ran out of time"

"The day got away from me"

"How is it already 8pm?"

Just because we didn't actively say, "I'm going to scroll through twitter and find out what my Hogwarts house says about my dessert preferences through a quiz" we choose to do just that.

We put different levels of importance on different tasks. For my fellow procrastinators out there, if the world is not going to implode right this minute, most of our tasks can wait. In that eleventh hour we become productivity machines. We also figure out really quickly what items on our list necessitate the highest priority. Because when you need to get at least four hours of sleep before the evil day job, you're going to make a few cuts to your list. And the ability to have a clean mug to drink coffee out of in the morning usually tops my list, which is why in my eleventh hour I end up doing dishes.

I've gotten to the point in my adulting journey where I've realized if I make the decision to do something with all my mind and my heart, it gets done. No matter what the task is, or how odd of a time in my life it has to happen, I get shit done. But...I have to be all in. 

I was trying to come up with a way to make you understand what "All In" means. 

The best example of this in my recent memory is when I decided hubby and I were going to move. I knew when I wanted to sign on the dotted line. I knew I didn't want to be in any transitionary housing, and I knew we couldn't afford to buy one house without selling the other. So I took on basically a full time job of prepping one house, hunting for another, securing the financing, and finally accomplishing the move. I didn't have a backup plan. We'd be successful, or we'd be homeless. I got shit done.

Was the move fun? Um...no. Were there some things that could have gone more smoothly? Definitely, but we are in our new house, with a lower monthly payment, and no one sued us. So we're doing good.

I was committed. And I realized that if I give myself that level of commitment, I CAN accomplish whatever I want. 

Never had something that was that life or death to compare it to? Okay...let's talk about the last time you really had to poop. Think back to that sense of urgency. I bet good money, you didn't just say, "Oh well. I don't have time to drop a deuce right now. I'll have to get to it tomorrow."

No matter what you were doing when that bad Mexican food from lunch hit you, you found a way to get to a bathroom.  You re-worked your drive route to stop in and obliterate a gas station bathroom. Or you re-thought your route home so you could avoid the massive pot holes that might have shaken something loose. You re-scheduled a meeting because there was no way you were going to be able to meet with a client and not shit your pants. You...in that moment...made the decision to go to the bathroom.

I can hear you now..."But Roxy, that's different. You can't NOT go to the bathroom." To you naysayers out there, I'm telling you, if you have the ability to rework your schedule to go to the bathroom, you have the ability to rework the schedule to get your work done.

All you have to do, is feel the urgency that comes with it. That "NOW" feeling that makes your toes curl, because it's got to happen right this very second. When you can make yourself feel that...then you've really decided to do something. 

I'm a writer, and one of the biggest problems I come across in my "Must Do" is getting started writing. I get interrupted. A dog vomits, a cat starts clawing the couch, or my problematic car dies and needs to get serviced...again. But when I really make the decision to write. I do it. I've written on my laptop in the repair shop. I've written on my phone while waiting in line at the vet. I've written on voice recording apps on my phone when stuck in traffic or running errands. I don't find the time, I create it.

So tell me...what have you decided is going to happen today? What are you going to create time for? I'd love to hear about it.

~Roxy

Today is a day that makes me smile. Because it was a way to play with my friends. 

I love April Fool's Day. Even the biggest companies get to make jokes and produce big spoofs for us to giggle at. I always scroll through the social media of my favorite folks and every time they partake in the big day.

My favorite post from today was this YouTube video. 

They get brownie points from me for the headphones on the goats.

But this is one of those days that you need to take every video and post with a skeptical eye. Leading to one of my favorite realities of April Fool's Day...this is the one day of the year where people investigate things before they re-post them. If only we could do that all year. ;)

I adore the little jokes and shenanigans that run rampant. Even if it means mentally tasting birthday cake flavored salad dressing. Ew.

In the end, I love any excuse to laugh and have a good time. Which is exactly why I have a couple of novellas that are perfect bedtime stories while you're wrapping up your last pranks of the day. Who knows...you may even get an idea or two out of them.

​I've provided links and a little about each book below. But if you want to get your hands on the FULL collection of stories I've somehow convinced my friends to write, head to AprilFoolsForLove.com and you'll find my stories plus some hilarious and sexy stories from Mary Hughes, Jodi Redford, S.L. Carpenter, and Kayleigh Malcolm. 

When The Lights Go Out
April Fools For Love 2015
​
Named after the date of her conception, April Prime was used to hiding away and avoiding the world on April Fools’ Day. Or at the very least, avoiding her parents who tended to celebrate the holiday very differently from the rest of the world.

This year would be different. This year she closed on a home, and was taking control of her life. A few hiccups had her headed to an office supply store in search of moving supplies. Crashing through a bathroom door, she stumbled on a bit more than she expected when mister tall, dark, and indisposed was already using the facilities.

Taylor James was stuck being the brunt of yet another round of April Fools’ pranks. One of them being a change of the bathroom door signs. He went to work knowing he’d have to navigate a mine field. What he didn’t expect was a woman bursting in on him only to send his head spinning.

Despite the scenery, April is ready to make a red-faced retreat. That’s when a car crash knocks out the power to everything inside the store, including the electronic locks.

By the glow of the emergency flood light the two realize they may be stuck for a long while. April and Taylor could wait out the inconvenience in silence, or they could capture a moment together, and just maybe find something special when the lights go out.
Warning: Sex in the dark may lead to orgasms and head injury.

Bottled Up
April Fools For Love 2016

A clogged drain. A pretend plumber. An April Fool’s Day to remember.
 
Good looks don’t last forever, and neither do modeling careers. When Nate’s time in the sun ends, he goes back to school. Trouble is, in order to pay for his last semester he’s going to need to get naked.
 
When a four month modeling contract took Nate Dallas on an adventure around the world, he was too young to realize he was an idiot to leave his Blue-eyed Betty behind. After one night of passion he let her love letters fade in his pocket instead of fighting for a trip home.
 
Betty Townsend never forgot about Nate. He’d sent her the world in envelopes filled with sea shells and sand. She saw stars when he kissed her under a sparkling spotlight on stage. And she felt her heart break when he never returned to her.
 
When Nate shows up at Betty’s door, big wrench in hand, she can’t believe her first love is the one her friend hired to fix the sink.
 
Once Nate recognizes Betty, stripping is out of the question. So is leaving. He can’t throw this chance away. The heat between them is undeniable, but when Betty finds out her first love is covered in glitter down to his g-string, do they stand a chance at rekindling the love that never really burned out? Or will fate make fools out of them again?

Happy April Fool's Day, everyone! May you not get stuck to your toilet, and may your oreos not be filled with toothpaste. Enjoy each other today, and make sure to send me your favorite pranks or jokes from today. Who knows...they may end up in the next installment of April Fools For Love!

~Roxy

I've been known to call my retail gig the "Evil Day Job". It was one of those titles that I'd always used to not give away too much information over the internet. I may not be well known, but I do have a public presence that anyone could find if they went digging.

This month, my day job earned it's "evil" descriptor. 

Part of my duties include unloading palettes of product from trucks. Part of my employers' duties include making sure I have the proper equipment to do my job. Our truck shipments come on standard-sized wooden palettes that you may have seen people around the Pinterest world turning into various DIY projects. The palettes are often poorly stacked, but this time the shipment had shelving and other items needed for a large reset.

These palettes were double the normal length. And we didn't have forklift extensions. Or a larger motorized lift to unload them. The only way I could get these items off the trucks were by using the motorized lift we did have to tow the palettes to the edge, because the driver didn't have any equipment either. And then it was a whole lot of improvising. 

Did I mention the wind chill was below zero and all of this was taking place outside as well?

Yeah. 

After a few calls, with such trouble-shooting genius from our general and district manager as "take breaks" and "drop the shit" I did what I've been doing for years and went to work. I was cold. I was tired, and I was over it.

All in all it took three hours to unload everything. I had gloves with grip that were rated for below zero temps, so my hands were fine, but being that I work retail, my outfit was just regular jeans and tennis shoes. It was when I started to thaw out that I knew I'd hurt myself.

Pro-tip: even if you're used to stopping when something hurts, below zero wind chill makes it so you can't feel when it hurts.

I felt a tightening and slow building pain starting in my lower back and knew I'd screwed up. So I went right from work, to the doctor's. Oh, I finished my shift first, because my boss gets a bonus if we stay below a certain level of hours, and there was no one else to cover the floor. Let me tell you how much I appreciate that.

Anyway, I went to the medcheck designated by my work for workman's comp cases, and was in plastic chairs for three hours, waiting for them to make a diagnosis that I could have told them walking in. I went home with orders to rest, and loaded up with heavy duty muscle relaxers and pain pills.

If you've ever had an injury or been in a car wreck, you know that the day after you hurt yourself is when you really find out how bad you hurt yourself.

Fam...it was bad.

Turns out I'd been bruising the hell out of my legs because I couldn't feel them, so not only was I in extreme pain in my back, but I looked like I'd gotten some really poorly lined leopard spot tattoos all over my legs. My cat sitting on my lap was akin to torture.

So I did what the doc told me to do and took the medicine as prescribed. 

Now. I've never done recreational drugs before. And after this past month I think I made the correct choice to steer clear of mind-altering substances. Because I think I spent the better part of this month roleplaying as a puddle. The muscle relaxers had me loopy and unable to form sentences. Either that or I was asleep. I don't think I saw more than half the day without the back side of my eyelids trying to slide in front of my view.

I was pissed off too. I have been injured on occasion. Sometimes it was my own clutzy fault, and sometimes it was just a freak accident. Things happen. But I'd never been put in a situation where I was told by my superiors to do something that was unsafe and it resulted in a serious injury. 

I was mad at my management. I was mad at the project planners. But what surprised me most was how mad I was at my own body for not being able to handle it. I run most everything around my house, and I ended up needing help with absolutely every task from laundry to dishes, to even pushing a grocery cart. 

It took as much mental work as physical treatment to heal after this. And realizing my employer took not only time spent at doctors appointments away from me, but also the time spent healing really made me the most angry. I lost pretty much a month of my life, and despite being on severe limitations, I had to show up to work and work within my restrictions or I wouldn't get paid. 

I'm finally able to handle being out of bed without pain or being stupefied with drugs. I was finally able to follow along enough to read a book again the past two days. But most importantly...I was able to start writing again.

Not gonna lie, I had to strip down to the bare minimum of social media. Bless Twitter for giving my brain short snippets of contact with the outside world. Because anything else...I just wasn't up to it. And I've seen enough authors stick a whole leg in their mouths that I pulled back from everything to make sure I didn't do something stupid online while on muscle relaxers.

You might be asking yourselves right now, "Okay, Roxy. This sounds awful. Why don't you quit?"

Turns out retail work experience only gets you retail jobs, and I've been at my current company long enough that no one in their right mind is going to pay me what I get paid anywhere else. So if I leave, I'm taking a minimum of a 40% pay cut. 

Y'all...momma needs her days off.

I've been talking to brick walls for years letting my superiors know that the way they are running things is not safe, and someone is going to get hurt. I work with some young kids, so I'm almost glad it was me and not them. I'm hoping that I raised enough of a stink about it, and racked up enough follow up visit doctor's bills that these folks are going to finally take notice and make some changes.

But I can tell y'all what...

This bitch right here isn't unloading reset trucks anymore. I'm going to be up at the front asking if you want the receipt with you or in the bag and waiting for the next person to make the "it didn't scan, so it must be free" joke.

Now that my head's clear, it's time to jump back into my life. 

Missed you guys. Let's talk about something more fun next time. How about periods? ;p

​~Roxy

The idea behind this post might seem counterintuitive to talk about as an author. You know...one who would love it if you were to buy a book or two. *HINT HINT* You could aways check the "Books" tab if you'd like to add some robosex or tiny house lovin' to your TBR pile.  

But before I was a writer, I was a reader. And money has never been something that could keep up with my appetite for books. I've been a coupon queen and purveyor of the sales rack for as long as I can remember. So I thought I'd share some of my tips for reading on a budget.

1. Don't be married to a format.
I absolutely ADORE reading on my Kindle. I love the ability for it to keep my exact spot. Since I can increase the font size, jumping right back into a book is super easy, even if I have to put it down in a hurry. But what I've learned over the past few years is that by allowing myself to be fluid in the format, I can take advantage of a lot of sales. When authors are looking to jump into new avenues, they tend to price things lower. Ebook, paper, audiobook, Radish serials, alternative vendor apps on my phone, all of them are there. Because sometimes an author wants to boost visibility on a certain platform, and they'll price items accordingly. 

2. Get intimate with your library, and others nearby.
I'm incredibly lucky to be in a city with a robust library catalog. My library consists of multiple branches and will bus books between them for me to pick up at no cost to me. BUT, I have purchased a PLAC (Public Library Access Card) in the past. For my state, it's only $65 for the entire year, and allows me to drop in and get a library card for any library in the state of Indiana. This was amazing for me in regards to program access the other libraries had as well. But solely on a book level, if you're struggling to find what you want in your library, check out what other libraries are around you. You might be able to pay a small fee and gain access to a vast amount of other options. Or gain library ebook access when you might not have it available otherwise. And libraries buy the copies of their books, so by requesting books you'd like to see from your favorite authors, or supporting your local library by buying a card, you're supporting those authors too.

3. Subscription services aren't all bad.
I'm going to pre-empt this with the fact that I'm not a subscriber for anything other than Audible at this moment. I personally didn't find the value for other subscription services because I didn't use them. But check out the catalogs for online services like Kindle Unlimited, Scribd, Playster, or KOBO Plus. You might find something that works for you, and most of them have free trials. I personally liked Audible the most. Aside from the fact that the books I purchase with my credits continue to be mine even if I pause or leave the subscription, (I'm not sure if this is true of the others or not), I have access to Audible exclusive titles, and even things like guided mediations and Yoga routines. However, some subscriptions require the author to be exclusive with the platform, and for that reason, some of the bigger names I'd like to use the subscription for, won't be available. I'd say to pick your top 10 favorite authors and see what kind of titles you can consume through a platform for each author. If you can't find that many, move along to the next.

4. Newsletters and Mailing Lists are more than junk mail.
Sometimes. I have been thinning out my newsletter and mailing list influx lately, because it got to be too much, and I'm pretty sure at least one or two of the authors I subscribed to sold or swapped my list, because I got some junk mail from people I'd never heard of before. (Authors if you're reading this...don't give your email list to another author. It's a bad look.) But there are plenty of services you can sign up for, like BookBub, that will compile lists of sales. And I mention BookBub because I know authors pay to get on that list, and have an investment involved to make the book they promote be a great one. 

Newsletters by your favorite authors are also a great way to learn about new releases, special promo pricing, and maybe even enter a giveaway. So while I'd caution to keep the subscriptions to ones you'll actually want to read, if you're on a budget, they can be an excellent source of information to save you big bucks.

5. Work your present-getting occasions to your benefit.
If your Aunt Cindy gives you another candle, you'd probably have enough to open your own shop. The vast majority of items you get from fairly distant relatives, or well-meaning family aren't things you'd prefer. Let them know you want book gift cards. Talk about it at family functions, tell your significant other to spread the word, tattoo the sentiment on your forehead, just get the word out that you want gift cards to Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, etc. Let people know you'd love to get that book bling much more than a blanket this year under the tree. You don't have to tell grandma that you wouldn't wear the jean vest she made, just let her know that you already have one and would love to get a book to cozy up with instead. If they want something to wrap, tell them to grab you a great hard cover new release you don't have the cash to splurge on yourself. If you hate the book selection the uncle you've blocked on Facebook gives you, just return it for in-store credit and grab the erotic romance you've had your eye on instead. 


I purposefully left off half price book stores on this list. The reason is, I like to find ways to support the authors who are writing the books, and unless you're buying from the "New" section, resale stores don't send checks to the authors. And don't get me started on the pirates out there sharing books on torrent sites and Google Drives. I hope you all get a virus.

Those are my tips for reading when the cash is tight. What are some of your favorite ways to feed your reading addiction? I'd love to hear about them! I'm diving into my next read as soon as I get this blog done. Happy Reading!

~Roxy

I follow quite a few editors I admire on Twitter. While scrolling mindlessly one day, some of them started talking about something called "#RevPit" and "#10queries".

So I went through the new to me hashtags and worked my way back to an article called "February #10Queries Event". It was an event that would show editors during a twelve hour timespan tweeting about submitted queries and first five pages. I have a few other agents and editors I follow that do something similar, and I'm always fascinated by what makes an agent or editor pick up or reject a manuscript. (Follow @LZats and her #500Queries thread if you aren't already.)

I needed to keep up on this shit! It was a no-brainer to go through the rafflecopter widget the blog post used and see if there were any other interesting people I needed to stalk. 

Not only do I love finding new writerly people on Twitter, but it would help me remember to follow the stream the day of. Well, turns out, by following these people, I was entering to win a review of my own query and first pages.

A query and first pages I didn't have yet. Which became glaringly obvious to my sleep-deprived brain when an email came through telling me I'd won and needed to send my query letter and first five pages within two days.

Ummmm....

I texted my lovely critique partner with a huge HELP! She told that we had this, and we got to work. Oh the things we're able to accomplish when we have a deadline, am I right? I had a manuscript that was "almost" done. I had an entire notebook filled with my brainstorming scribbles, and I had a few inspiration pics along with a happy notes notebook filled with research. A polished first five and decent query? Nope. Definitely didn't have that anywhere near done.

So we worked. My CP is fucking brilliant, and somehow she says the perfect things that send me in the directions I didn't know I needed to go. We had something at the end that flowed beautifully. It had taken us all damn night, but the eve of the due date, I hit send.

Sure...the morning after I double checked everything and had a "choose/chose" error. Because OF COURSE I DID. But it was off into the void, and there was no taking back that email.

​I was suddenly obsessed with following the #10Queries hashtag. The few days between us sending off our work, and the event were filled with editors teasing us in the best way. 

The day of, I stalked the feed far more than I thought I would. But before you tease me relentlessly, here's the thing... I hadn't put my work out to anyone in over a year. My little creative heart was absolutely palpitating just waiting for the first scraps of feedback. 

It turned out there were only a couple paranormal romance books entered into the contest, so my CP and I traded screenshots and tweets over the course of the event. 

"What about this one?"

"Nah. I wouldn't describe your writing like that. Maybe this one?"

"Nope, didn't have that event in my pages. Not me."

Rinse. Repeat. Continue for twelve hours. 

​Okay. Event over. It ended at 10pm which is usually my bed time. Some of the editors posted that they'd sent off the reveal of who their tweets were for. 

I checked my email. Nope. Not mine. I stayed up until 11:30pm that night, which for this early bird is pushing it. When I got up at five in the morning the next day (#5amclub4life) I checked again. Nope. Nothing. Nadda.

I waited, scrolled, obsessed, and guessed for the better part of the next five days, and honestly, it got a little sad. Some folks were posting about the "great feedback" and "all the work" that the editors did. Okay. I subdued my mind a little by guessing my editor must have been putting some specific suggestions together regarding my query and first five. If I had to wait a little longer for an email, I'd suffer through it.

​Then the email came. Five days later. And revealed my tweets. Just my tweets. No other feedback was provided.

At least I found out which tweets were mine, and for the most part, they overwhelmingly positive. But here's my overall takeaway from this event.

I think that by following along trying to figure out which tweets were mine, I lost some of the value in the other tweets. Because once I eliminated them and moved to the next, it was hard to pay attention.

Like I said, the tweets were the only feedback I received. So if you're going into this thinking you're going to get a track changes style edit, don't get your hopes up. Maybe others got more detailed review than I did, but I think it all depended on which editor was randomly assigned the projects.

While it was good for me to practice the query, and get my editing gears turning again, I don't think I'd enter this particular contest again, because I feel like I missed out on a lot of the advice in the other tweets. My obsessive mind latched onto which tweets were about me, and I couldn't stop tearing them apart looking for clues. 

I think the #10Queries loop was fantastic to follow as a spectator, however. Now that I'm on the other side of the event, I've been reviewing some of the information, and I missed a lot of the good stuff. 

And while I'm not jumping up and down, I do have a query letter finished that I wouldn't have otherwise. Win. I'm going to send it off to a few other people to get some detailed feedback on, because I'd like some specifics. And I'm more confident it's not a total piece of garbage. Also a win.

Turned out this event came before the due date for my #CarinaPitch entry I got a like on. So...it was a damn good couple months on Twitter for me. 

Have you entered a Twitter pitch contest before? What did you think of it? Were your expectations higher than the reality? Would you enter your particular event again? I'd love to hear about it.

​~Roxy

Well, first of all, I should say I'm still on my Kylie Scott binge. Damn, can that woman write!! And being that she has a decent backlist I've got two of her series going on side by side at the moment. I tend to have both audio and ebooks on hand so I can get my read on no matter what the circumstances. This woman is all over my kindle, overdrive, and audible applications.

My family recently became a one vehicle household due to budget cuts, and I think I spend at least half of my waking hours either getting ready to get in the car, being in the car, or filling the car up with gas. 

Obviously, reading an ebook while doing these things is not conducive to my, or my family's, survival. 

Enter Audible. 

I don't have any special links with kickback, or a brand deal. Good lord, I wish! But I have been obsessed with my Audible subscription. And other than my coffee and wine budget, it's the one luxury I spend the money on. Why? Because if I have to listen to one more radio DJ talk in my ear I'll tear the damn device out of the dash with my bare hands. I do enjoy music, but I'm over the ads, and with an election coming up, I am not down for the smear campaigns. 

I have wireless earbuds I keep in my ears almost all day, and as I start my long hours of errands, and...you guessed it...car driving, I simply push a button and I'm reading.

I'm on the basic audible subscription, but I tend to save up my credits and bulk buy. So I listen to new to me authors on Overdrive and borrow from my local library. And if a book I'm interested in checking out isn't there, I recommend my library pick it up. Seriously, if you are bummed by your library's digital selections, pop a recommendation in through Overdrive. My library has purchased quite a few books I've suggested. Although, if it's a book I want NOW, I pop over to Audible or Amazon and download anyway. Life is too short not to read a book NOW.

​Currently I have "Deep" in my ears. I'm working my way through the Stage Dive series at record pace. And honestly, I'm kind of shocked because I'm not really a rockstar trope type of gal. But the situations she's thrust these characters into, the story telling and the outright funny moments have me absolutely enamored. 

The narrator for this series is stellar. Andi Arndt is going to be a voice I'm on the lookout for. And seriously...just pulling up a link for this narrator, I found an Audible Original and one-clicked the hell out of that shit. 

I adore finding an author that checks all of my Romance boxes. Kylie Scott has deep POV, humor, spice, and a talent for building a world it's easy to get lost in all the while telling a story that locks you into one couple at a time. Now that I've been so entrenched in audio books, a great narrator has also gone up high on that list. 

Turns out, I'm a single narrator listener. I'm not thrilled when there's a cast. And since the Stage Dive novels are told from one POV, it works out even better, because I feel like I'm listening to a friend tell me the most fantastic tales. 

Do you listen to audio books? I used to only listen to self-help books, but I am loving having romance in my ears as well as beneath my fingers. Do you have any favorite listens? Or narrators you adore? I'd love to hear about it. 

~Roxy

Okay. Hear me out. I think cats are psychic. Or at the very least, empathic. 

I've noticed over the past few months that my stress level correlates with how much of an asshole my cat is.

If I'm stressed out, and grumpy, my cat claws at the furniture more. If I'm sad and depressed, my cat eats less. If I'm upbeat and happy, my cat can't be out of my sight and is kneading my legs with a loud boisterous purr motor. 

There are a whole lot of beliefs about felines throughout history. They were everything from unlucky minions of the devil, to revered gods or hosts to souls awaiting their trip to paradise. But I'm not talking about that. 

I'm talking about modern cat ways.

I know a lot of people who feel cats are attuned to things just outside our knowledge. They will stare at nothing for long stretches of time. They get agitated for no real reason.  And let's not talk about the "kill" button that exists right next to the "happy purr" one. I know I'm not the only one who has gotten a decent bunny kick to remind me to trim my cat's nails.

Cats are intensely expressive. I'd argue more than dogs, but man's best friend can work some puppy eyes. However, I'm talking about more than emoting. I find cat behaviors are influenced by what energy we put out there. 

Since I've been working every morning on my morning pages, I've got a damn good record of my mental state each day. And the funny thing is, I've started to see some very interesting correlation between my mood and my cat's behavior. 

A few days ago, I was stressed about a lot of things. I was running short on money and the bills were starting to pile. I had been running like crazy to attempt to get clean clothes in the closet and clean dishes in the cupboards. I was living on coffee and chasing a timer to get it all accomplished before I had to run and pick up hubby from work. I realized I hadn't seen the cat all day. I found him when I went to put away some towels. 

Some cats hide often, but this guy usually owns a room. Plopping down in the middle of a doorway, or the floor where multiple people have to step over him. I realized I was stressed and he reacted to my energy by holing up in a tight space where the scents of everyone in the family were. Interesting.

Another day I was writing about feeling really down. I felt a lot of failure piling up in my mind, and it was one of those days where I read a book out of necessity for escape. I needed a happily ever after in the worst way. While I was reading he climbed up on my lap. His paws stretched out so he was gripping the side of my leg. This guy tends to lay on my legs from ankle to hip when he's looking to sleep. This time he curled up sideways and melted into my lap. I've noticed a few times since then, when I've been sad, he's gripped my legs in what looks like a hug. Of course he uses claws to maintain his grip, but it's the thought that counts. 

I've been starting to mark down odd things he does in my journal, because this critter has become a barometer for me to check my emotional state. 

When I'm in the thick of my To Do list for the day, my mental state rarely crosses my mind. But when my cat leaps out from behind the couch and starts scaling the arm of it as if it's the only way out of a pit of lava, I pause. Nine times out of ten, I'm in the middle of a mental spiral of negativity and need to take a break. 

So I'm convinced. Cats can read our emotions. At least mine can. And better than I'm able to most days. 

What about your pets? Do you notice a difference in how they act around you during emotionally charged moments? I'd love to hear about it.

​~Roxy

I wanted to try something a little different here. I've been listening to podcasts for a while, and although I might not be ready to pull the trigger on that just yet, I thought I'd test out an audio chat with you guys.

Let me know what you think!

In the short chat below I discuss expectations in Romance. Turns out I have some hard and fast rules regarding expectations, and when I read books labeled romance, they better have a few things involved in the Happily Ever After.

From focus on the romantic relationship to consent, I chat about what I expect when I pick up a book. (TW: I do discuss rape, but only on a surface level.)

Tell me what you look for in Romancelandia. Do you agree with me? Or do you think I'm dead wrong? I'd love to hear about it.

​~Roxy

I am married. I have been married for sixteen years. It took me most of those sixteen years to convince my husband that I'm not a fan of Valentine's Day. 

Yes. I said it. I'm not a fan of this holiday.

But you're a romance author!

Yes. I know.

How can you hate love?

Whoa. Nope. Back that train up. I love love. I adore romance. I despise someone trying to tell me that if I don't perform specific actions or buy specific things that my love somehow isn't good enough.

Love is about more than candy and flowers and a meal at a crowded restaurant where you have to repeat yourself because of the noise level.

For me, love is coming home to a clean kitchen and takeout after a long day of work. Love is a dirty text at an inappropriate moment that makes you laugh. Love is sneaking a smack on the ass while walking by in a crowded room, or a distracting blow job during a video game. Hubby has treated me with chocolates at the most random times, and it's the best. And every year he buys me a single white rose on our anniversary to commemorate out rose ceremony from our wedding vows.

Love doesn't need to be big and audacious. For me, love is comfortable and overwhelming at the same time. It's that feeling of needing someone to be with you, but not needing to entertain them. It's finding someone to celebrate success with, but still flourishing in tight times or uncomfortable living arrangements. Love makes it okay, because the person you're with makes everything better. Not because they fix everything, but because them being by your side means you're blessed with more than money could ever buy.

I'm a huge fan of creating our own holidays. Things that mean the world to us. Like the day we got married. And the cold day in January almost twenty years ago that hubby pulled a diamond ring from his pocket and proposed, because the idea of waiting until Valentine's Day was too much. Those times are worth celebrating.

Don't get me wrong...Valentine's Day isn't all bad. There tend to be some damn good sales going on. Especially the day after Valentine's Day. Who else is excited for "Half Off Chocolate Hearts" Day? ME!


~Roxy