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Don't Shit on someone Else's Joy

9/30/2018

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This blog is going to be very short and not at all sweet.

I would say I'm mad, but mostly I'm just tired. I temper the things I say for the most part to keep my content light. I like to think I'm hilarious too, but ya' know...could just be me laughing at my own jokes. Everyone has different tastes.

But there is something that needs to be said. 

Don't Shit on Someone Else's Joy.

Just don't. If someone comes up to you and has a glint in their eyes about a book or a movie, or an activity. Don't make an ewe face. Don't ask them why they would ever enjoy such a thing. 

We're all guilty of this from time to time, and it's important to take a step back and take stock. I know friends of mine have talked about camping, and for the life of me, I can't imagine why I would pretend to be homeless voluntarily. It's just not my bag, and the way bugs like to bite me, I'm pretty sure even with the strongest bug spray I'd come back anemic.

But I try and say things like "It sounds like you had fun." Because I'm also careful not to get invited to things that are really not for me. I have learned a lot about myself and I know I need temperature controls and indoor plumbing. But I do enjoy a crackling fire and hanging with people I adore without tech taking up the day.

So I get it from that point and that's what I try to do in every situation like this. I pull a perspective where I can relate. It's really hard sometimes, but it's possible.

Yesterday I went to a fabulous event put on by a local mystery writers' group. The speaker was fantastic, and although her methods and genre were different than mine, I took a lot away from the event. Then an incident happened where I was made to feel ridiculed and looked down upon because I write romance. 

I'm not going into details, because I was a guest, and for the most part, other than feeling a bit out of place, I had a great time. I don't want to talk bad about the group or the event because it was well done and free. So I don't feel like I have a whole lot of room to complain. 

But when someone insinuates that my genre is trivial when theirs is not, just makes me so damn grumpy. Because in the end, all genre fiction has the same basic structure. We all have specific items that need to be followed to fit into the genre. We all have specific things that need to happen. Like in romance, it's an HEA. In a mystery, we need to solve the puzzle. In a thriller, the bad guy or thing has to be stopped. If you don't do those things, your readers are going to be pissed. So why is it that my genre is trivial, while yours isn't?

Just because you don't understand something doesn't mean it's bad. Just because you don't find joy in certain books, doesn't mean they're pointless. (Especially when they hold the lion's share of book buying dollars, but we won't go there.)

If you love Fifty Shades of Grey, if you love Twilight, if you love Erotica, if you love Inspirationals, or if you love Manga...embrace it. And fuck anyone who says you can't find joy in something. 

If someone finds a book or movie troubling because they believe certain themes were sending a horrible message (The article about 16 Candles comes to mind here), you might want to acknowledge it. But much of our cinematic and literary history is problematic. It's a decision you have to make for yourself. 

But if someone is coming at you because they don't think your form of entertainment is worthy for the sole reason that they don't like it...show them your favorite finger and flounce.

Like I said. This is something I know I've been guilty of in the past, and I work hard now to avoid doing it. So I wanted to share as a reminder to the collective or anyone who stumbles across my blog...

Don't Shit on Someone Else's Joy


~Roxy


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